Sunday, September 12, 2010

Hip Waders and Bent Coat Hangars


This morning I performed my first-ever Baptism. I was initially going to baptize one of my third graders, but as it turned out I also baptized twin 7th Grade girls. Not my first at this church...my first ever. And I didn't take "Life and Work of the Pastor" in Seminary, so I had never practiced this.

I think it went well...although I feel like I slobbered all over myself, everyone else said I was a natural.

At this church, white robes are a thing of the past...the candidates wear a swimsuit with a 2BC Baptism t-shirt over the top. At the end of the day, they take the t-shirt home as a souvenir. The pastor performing the baptism wears waders and the same t-shirt.


This was my first time in waders...and I'm not sure if this is a normal thing to happen or if I didn't have them on correctly, but as I entered the water, an exercise of physics occurred. The force of the water displaced the air inside the waders. No, bubbles did not emerge...nothing like that. They simply became SKIN TIGHT. I actually wondered after a while if my circulation was being cut-off. I then experienced the terror of what ifs...


What if I pass out from lack of circulation?

What if, as I exit, they make some sort of noise...like a balloon with all its air being let out...filling the church with crude sound effects and rolling waves of laughter?


What if they're so stuck on me that I can't get them off and the volunteers and parents of these kids have to cut me out of these things??? Thank the Lord I listened to my mother and wore good underwear...


By the Grace of God...none of that happened. I exited the water, the waders loosened, and I was free and dry...and ready to conquer the next challenge.

We have uniformed, off-duty police officers who work the children's building on the weekend. Earlier this morning, I had overheard one of our elderly members pleading with the officer on duty to help her retrieve her car keys from her locked trunk. (And this will likely be another post all-together...Conway PD is no longer allowed to do this unless it is a true emergency...apparently someone sued the PD for scratching the paint on their car when they came to their rescue...seriously people).


Anyway, I was walking from one building to the next when I saw this poor lady - whose daughter had now arrived to help - trying to pry the car door open with a coat hangar. I stood with them for about ten minutes and tried to guide the daughter through the process. After several attempts, she gave up. I took the wire, and (seriously here) within about 15 seconds had the door open. I may have a career in auto theft ahead of me.


So all in all, it was a productive morning. Baptisms, car break-ins, lots of fun and just another day at Second Baptist, Conway.

And on a random note...this is the check-in slip that prints when you bring Benjamin on Sunday mornings. The pictures were taken our first morning at 2BC, so he was not yet sure of his surroundings.





Does he NOT look like the school bully?????? This pic kills me. I'm changing it this week so as not to terrorize his volunteers or other children. Still...it cracks me up!

2 comments:

Jill said...

Love Ben's mug shot! :) Looks like he may be able to break into cars soon, too! :)

Lauren said...

You shouldn't tell people you can get into locked cars. You know we'll all be calling you when we lock our keys in our cars. Maybe you could just teach me how. Why didn't we learn any real skills in college? No one EVER needs a well-argued paper from me anymore. Ever.

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